Reality

I awoke this morning with a pounding in my head and in my heart. I am so out of sorts. I know I have so many emotions going on with daughter and her family moving back in. Not all bad, but clumped up and tangled on the inside. I look at her room, which is in complete disarray with the floor torn up and two desks in here, walls needing paint and I just can't fathom how the three of them are going to move in here.

Yesterday I took my final exam, which I did not pass. There have only been 3 exams that I have not passed the whole time I have been in school, and two of them have been in this class. And it isn't because the class is hard, but rather I have just not put any effort into it at all. I know that I can't study for 3 hours before the exam and expect to do well. Yet, that is exactly what I have done all summer. In the end, I think I will pass the class. I have gotten full points for all the other side work and I kicked butt on an exam I had to take on Monday. Yup, it sucked with a test on Monday and a final full review on Wednesday. I should have been studying for days, but I all ready admitted that I didn't.

I have been going to school year-round for about 2 years now. I really really need a break. But I don't see one in sight. Starting next week I will be working 2 jobs, and there is a hint of another one too. I am supposed to go to a training for this new job on Monday. I don't even know for sure what it is because I am dealing with a recruiter and they won't release the name of the company. I haven't had an interview or anything. The whole thing is weird, but I am a whore to the all mighty dollar right now and will take whatever I can. Then school begins again for me in about 3 weeks. The last sememster and only clinicals, so it shouldn't be too horrible.

The jeep overheated - almost - on me yesterday. Today I need to call the shop and bring it in. Because I have spent all my cash on Joe's school registration, and money for the U-Haul I am a little strapped for cash. Pay day is still a week a way and I don't want to ask the husband because he still isn't working. Hopefully, it is just something minor that won't cost me much. But I wanted to buy my fishing license today and now I won't even plunk the $20 down for that.

Gonna go make breakfast for the men now. It's 9 AM and I've been up since 5 AM. I told the husband last night that I was concerned about the kids moving back, and he told me to stop worrying because I couldn't do anything about it. Pretty relaxed statement from him. So, I figure I'll make the ham and eggs he has been asking for. He has to work tonight and I am off - then we switch and I work for the next several nights. We rarely see each other. At least tonight we should be able to snuggle between the sheets together and both be awake at the same time.